Sunday, February 21, 2010

A Word About the New Girl

I hate being the new girl. I feel like I'm putting myself out there, calling all that attention to myself by joining some new group of people, and I won't find out if I really fit in until after I've taken that leap.

I've taken that leap and been hurt before. In fact, I've even been turned on by "friends" I thought I was safe with. And I hate the feeling of being a misfit, or of being unimportant. I fear it. When I think about it, and the things I've been through that gave me that fear, it opens the wounds all over again. So it's much, much safer feeling for me to avoid new groups of people. And I have the tendency to do that unless I'm pretty much guaranteed a place of real acceptance.

I'm writing this to you to remind you to really take a caring interest in new people, wherever you find them. And I don't just mean a superficial, twenty-questions and then leave them behind kind of interest. People can tell the difference between that and when you actually take the time to enjoy their company, and people have a real, pressing need to be enjoyed by other people.

I hope that you have plenty of good relationships in your life. But I hope that you never get too tied up in those relationships to share the love with the new girl.

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